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Relationships Unfiltered (Part 2)

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Viewer-Guided Chaos 

    Welcome back, brave souls. After the absolute mess (and magic) that was Relationships: Part 1, I thought, why not hand the mic over to you?

So I did.

    You sent your hottest takes, wildest stories, cringiest pickup lines, and most profound questions. And because I love chaos, I’m sharing them right here, unfiltered. (Okay, maybe a little filtered and not all of them because there was a lot...sorry guys)

Buckle up. It’s about to get loud.

Statements

Where some of you made me cry (some because I laughed so hard and some were sweet)

    • "My fear was that she would think I'm one of those guys that just sit and rot their brain for hours and hours every day. I don't think any woman wants a man like that." - Anonymous (Anonymous, you're right, no woman wants a man like that. Because 9/10 those men are just boys in a grown man's body. But more than disliking a man who just plays video games,, a woman can't stand a guy who hides part of who he is from her. Be real, and if she doesn't like you for you, then it's her loss.)
    • "Sometimes I wonder if I jumped the gun and messed up. Sometimes I worry I'll never move on. I get scared when I think about moving on, because what if they were the one? And I screwed it up" -N. (Well, N, I get that. But let me say if they were the one, you wouldn't have to wonder the things you are.)
    • [In response to a situation someone shared with them] "I want you to know that whatever he did to you or whatever you did with him doesn't devalue you or make you less special" - LM. (I think everyone needs to hear that, regardless of their situation. Thank you for sharing.)
    • The worst part about a break-up is having to pay for your own food and no longer having someone to be with you 24/7… wait, that one might be a plus. -single lady (same girl, same)

Story Time: Viewer Edition

Where love, horror, and secondhand embarrassment collide.

(Paraphrased and anonymized to protect the innocent) 

  • "I liked a girl, but was too shy/nervous to tell her. A friend of mine urged me to talk to her, but he talked to her. He made fun of a purity ring she wore, and I didn't do anything... They eventually got together, and their relationship was not the best. There was quite a few years between them and the guy really pressured the girl into doing a lot that before the relationship she wouldn't have done. Eventually, they broke up, but not before they broke several boundaries she had set before." (Wow, that sounds like a touchy subject-literally. It sounds like you were used as a buffer. I hate that for you. I'm sorry you had to go through that, no one likes being a third wheel.) 

Pickup Lines: The Good, The Bad, and the WHY

Because love is patient, love is kind... but these pickup lines are neither.

  • "Are you French? Because Eiffel for you."
  • "I was blinded by your beauty.. I’m going to need your name and number for insurance purposes."
  • "Are you a time traveler? Because I can see you in my future."
  • "Do you believe in love at first sight — or should I walk by again?"
  • "Are you a parking ticket? Because you’ve got '‘FINE’ written all over you."
  • "Do you have a map? Because I keep getting lost in your eyes."
  • "If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber."
  • "You must be made of copper and tellurium — because your CU TE."
  • "Are you a bank loan? Because you have my interest, and I'm deeply in debt."
  • "You smell like trash. Can I take you out?"
  • "Are you an omelet? Because you make me want to crack under pressure."
  • "I’m not a photographer, but I can picture us getting a restraining order."
  • What do Ariel and I have in common? We both wanna be a part of your world.

(Feel free to rate them 1-10 or react with GIF energy: 🧡💀🚩.)

Viewer Q&A: Ask Alyssa (At Your Own Risk)

Where you asked and I answered. Or at least tried.

  • How should each side of a relationship respect the other?

(Respect starts with remembering that the other person is an actual human being — not your free therapist, not a mind-reader, and definitely not a backup plan. If you want real love, you need absolute respect. That means listening when they talk, instead of mentally drafting your Chipotle order. It means being honest even when it's uncomfortable (no, ghosting is not self-care). It means setting boundaries and honoring theirs. You’re guarding the crown jewels, not bulldozing over them because you "didn't feel like it.” Respect also looks like celebrating their wins without secretly getting jealous because they're thriving while you're still losing to Wordle puzzles. It’s apologizing when you’re wrong, instead of doubling down like a bad Twitter thread. And maybe most importantly, it’s choosing kindness even when you’re tired, stressed, or hangry enough to bite someone. Bottom line? If you can't offer basic human decency, you’re not ready for a relationship. But maybe consider a solo hike in the woods to find yourself.)


  • Do the boundaries that were broken [in your relationship] ever make you feel bad about yourself? (With a slightly reworded answer than what I gave them)
(Yes, while with him, I felt awful 24/7. In fact, I even had thoughts that I should just quit praying and even give up on life. It was depressing, as any relationship that causes you to grow apart from everyone and everything else in your life is. Even after we broke up, I felt soooo much shame and guilt, I felt "easy" and that I wasn't as good as other Christians, especially Christian girls who hadn't messed up like I had. It also didn't help that people talk... But at the end of the day, my sin does not define me; my Savior does. And the same is true for every situation. Thanks for asking.)

Closing Thoughts

This was a wild ride, and honestly, y'all delivered exactly the chaotic energy I hoped for.
Thank you for your stories, your spicy takes, your terrible pickup lines, and your brave, brave questions.
Should there be a Part 3?
Only if you promise to send EVEN WORSE pickup lines. I'm ready. Are you?

Until next time,

— Alyssa 🦩

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